Since four or five months ago I had decided to quit believing. My self-esteem's not alright. I want to sell my soul to someone... I feel stupid and ignorant and many people agree with it. I'm not important, I lost everything. I want to fade away and never come back. I would like to go back to those moments where nothing else matter. I wanna be forever a child. I want to take back my security. I don't want to grow old. I still fear. It's paranoic to compare this fucking reallity with my own desires. It's time to wake up and figure out that nothing really exists. Everything fades away. exactly when you think everything's going alright. I had my happiness and seemed to be for always. But now it doesn't matter if I regret. I don't have any will to keep believing or dreaming. Now I've got a clear idea about my beliefs. Nothing lasts forever or for an eternity. Everything's ephimeral and short. This was just another nightmare where I am trapped. I wanna hold you again... but this time for a lifetime. You let me fall apart; laying me here, alone, undone, and with a strong will to fade me away. I'm not strong, but I pretend to be it. 'Cause I don't want to make you feel important and proud. I won't help you to increase your vanity. For what? For helping you to make me feel more coward and weak? Your words are always the same. You never change their sense even though you know I'm dying inside. But I'll never tell you, how much I am suffering... How much is this hurt, killin' me slowly... Never.. You'll never know... N E V E R 
I swear it